A Pause In Lent 3

So here we are again. Pausing. Thinking. Wondering what insights I have. And deciding it’s very few at the moment. Sorry.

I’m feeling as though I shouldn’t really be doing this. I feel a bit of a fraud: I’m not thinking about God in any real way at the moment, and Lent has actually made no impact on my life, spiritual or otherwise. I’ve not given up anything, I’ve not taken on anything (except this!). I feel a vague sense of guilt – but only very vague – but also a vague sense of not caring. I think I’m going through A Gloomy Sunday Afternoon Of The Soul (I can’t call it a Dark Night Of the Soul, as that title gives it more importance than it has.)

So. Maybe in my spiritual growth I’m going through through those difficult teenage years, where all they seem to want to do is mope about and sleep. They’re not interested in their parents, they heave great sighs of ennui and teenage anguish, they drift about not doing anything, and get grumpy if their parents suggest they might be wasting their life.  But every now and then they deign to join in with a family occasion, and can suddenly be quite charming.

I hope that my Father in Heaven will stay steadfast to me. If earthly parents can manage to love their difficult teenagers through these years, then I’m fairly sure God will be able to love me as I drift and mope and sigh. And I hope that I will finally come through the teenage Spiritual years a more rounded being.

I was lucky enough to have a wonderful father. He died far too young of cancer, but I have fond memories of a dad who loved and cared for his three children. There were rarely rows and arguments in our household (except possibly between me and my brother!) and I remember many many happy occasions. I don’t think I was a difficult teenager (although mum may disagree with that!) but I certainly did my fair share of moping, and staying shut up in my bedroom, but I never had a sense of my parents losing faith in me. Thanks to both my parents, I believe I’ve grown into a fairly well-rounded, reasonably feet-on-the-ground person. (although Mr D may disgree with that!)

So here is a poem, dedicated particularly to Dad, but also to Mum, who has spent too many years than she should have done without her Helpmeet at her side. I love you both.

A meditation on Psalm 37, verses 23 & 24

The steps of a man are established by the Lord,and he delights in his way.When he falls he shall not be hurled headlong because the Lord is the one who holds his hand



You know the way you want us to go;

Planned and perfect,

Complete and right.


You take us by the hand

As a  father takes his child,

and you delight in teaching us.

You show us your glories,

You teach us your way,

and you share your love with us.



as children often do,

we will slip our hand from your loving guiding grip,

and wander on a path that is not yours.

We are tempted away from you

by the glitter and gaudiness of the world.

We ignore your warning cries

and we fail so many times

to listen to your voice.

You do not force us.

You do not pull us.

You do not leave us.

Instead you watch for us,

you wait for us,

you love us.


And,as a child who does not hold his father’s hand

has no protection when he falls,

so too do we have nothing to save us when we fall.

But as we lie,

battered and bruised by life,

and crying for help,

you are there

there to pick us up,

to hold us in your arms,

and to tell us that you love us


And maybe next time we will have learned,

learned to hold your hand a little tighter,

learned to follow your ways a little closer.

For if we walk with you

and hold your hand

We know that we are safe,

and that you will not allow us

to fall.

Tags: ,

6 Responses to “A Pause In Lent 3”

  1. Floss Says:

    I’m so glad you’re here with us. We have to be honest with God and you are. Your poem is beautiful. And Psalm 37 seemes to be the Psalm for the Day – I just read the first part of it over in the South Pacific (OK on a blog from the SP) and felt really encouraged ! It’s here:

  2. Karin Says:

    I have some sympathy with you, Dormouse. I’ve felt more than once that I wasn’t ready for Lent, or Lent was at the wrong time of year for me. These days I reflect of God etc when I am in the mood to do so, rather than because of the season we are in. In an ideal world I think we would all be better off mentally and physically to spend some time reflecting and meditating on a daily basis, but I haven’t managed to get into such a habit yet. I shan’t feel guilty, but I know my life and overall well-being would be enhanced if I could. It is something to aim for, not because someone has told me to do so, but because I know I would benefit.

    How would you hope thinking about God during Lent could benefit you? Is that a realistic expectation? If so, what could you do to make it more likely to happen? Perhaps there isn’t anything, in which case, why not let it go this time. Sometimes the harder we try the less we can do it and when we stop trying we suddenly find it has happened.

  3. The Mad House Says:

    I am sat in tears at that poem. I am finding lent very hard this year and I am so upset as my mum died on Christmas eve. I am angry and something of a reluctant worshipper at the moment

  4. Carolyn Phillips Says:

    That poem is beautiful and reflects the situation we all find ourselves in from time to time.

    My own testimony is that wherever we go, how ever much we sulk, however long we ignore him, God does not stop loving us. He never looses sight of us.

    Your honesty is the best place to be.

  5. magsmcc Says:

    How beautiful- thank you for this.

  6. annie Says:

    God, our Father, is never far from us. We all have times in our life when just knowing His comfort and friendship is there is enough. With time the friendship will deepen.

    “Be still and know that I am God!” is the first part of Psalm 46:10. The word “still” comes from a Hebrew word meaning to “let go” or “release.” The meaning would be best understood to say “cause yourself to become restrained or to let go.” In other words, we need to come to a place where we are willing to submit ourselves to God and acknowledging that He is in sovereign control.

    When we realize that we are truly incapable of controlling life, we can surrender our will to God’s will. It may be a matter of finally saying we trust Him. This will open the door so that we may experience the fullness of all God wants and has for us. After all, He is our Creator and has a perfect plan for us when we let Him orchestrate it.